Phew! So here I am, finally writing about my Peru experience. I’ve been back 2 & half months already & only now do things start to fall into place. I began this blog many times, but got stuck after the first paragraph, as I simply didn’t know what to write, or where to start! This is the 18th draft…. which maybe should become a book, lol.
So let me state right now – Peru was not what I expected… nothing could’ve prepared me.
Want to make God laugh? Tell him your plans!
None of my assumptions were met, lol. Instead it was an extreme mix of delight, adventure & trauma – with a wisdom so deep to fathom, I can only absorb it in small bites.
Peru is a country of unbelievably ancient wisdom & beautiful, majestic mountains – & I mean majestic. I have traveled much in my lifetime & seen many mountains all over the world, but the Mountains (Apu’s) in Peru had a presence that is hard to describe.
They are like beings, holding space for the sacred.
I couldn’t soak them up enough.
Even Machu Picchu, which was quite surreal to visit, was overwhelming for me – because of the Mountains it is surrounded by! Tourists were asking why the Mayans would build Machu Picchu there. Afterall, it takes 4 & half hours to travel there by train, there are no roads, many challenges & expenses to overcome (thanks weak Rand) to reach there. You travel through changing landscapes that become thick jungle – but to me it made sense: to live on the peak of a mountain, surrounded by many other gigantic mountains – is like living in an Ashram with many holy masters in situ. Why wouldn’t people build there!
I hiked the peak that overlooks Machu Picchu, a 2 hour steep climb – not for the fainthearted, but totally worth the
effort. To sit, surrounded by ALL these Mountain peaks was absolute bliss for me.
….and yes of course, the stone city of Machu Picchu is intriguing. Spirituality was so part of these people’s lives. It is filled with beautiful temples with a variety of intentions; windows into other dimensions; & other incredible designs that were so connected to nature. Like the Condor Temple: a massive spherical rock which had been split in half, so that it represented condor wings, and then they added/molded/sculptured the head & claws etc – & created a temple. The Condor is a big part of the Andean tradition, alongside the Eagle, Jaguar & Snake. There is so much they tap into with nature, that we take for granted – it was humbling.
In the Healing Temple, I managed to lie down on a stone, custom-made to softly hold the entire human body. There I did a quick ritual & chakra cleanse, before the next tourists walked through 😉 It was quite magical.
I am so glad I played tourist while I could, because once I joined my group later, it was all work, & no play. And though the Mountains remained the focus of awe throughout the trip for me, processing hit me like a Tsunami.
We had the Filmmaker (see previous blog) & 5 Paqos as guides. One of the Paqos being the AltoMisayoq (he holds highest
form of initiation) – only a very few of them left in all of Peru & South America apparently. The other one has now retired – as she feels that at 86 she finds it hard to hold the energy of the Apu’s & Galaxies, etc. (quite understandable really 🙂
She did her last ‘appearance’ with us, we felt VERY lucky. For many generations women were not included in the initiation lineages, she was the first to break this pattern – she was our highly respected feminist counterpart – & an immensely wise, cutie pie.
Adolfo, thee AltoMisayoq, who was with us throughout the trip, taught us many of his techniques, sharing his experiences & storytelling. It really is another world he lives in. I felt very honored to be shown techniques & energy systems handed down through their Ancestors, as well as secrets of communication with their land & sacred sites. I have a deep love for this, I’m guessing from way, way, waaaay back.:)
For 2 & half weeks, every day we purified through rituals, invocations with Pachamama(Gaia) & the Apu’s (Sacred Mountains), & sacred site visitations – along with clean eating, etc. All starting the very first night we were there! It was unrelenting & intense. Fascinating. Mind blowing -and beautiful all at the same time…
But then, the American filmmaker, who facilitated & translated for our group, simply had not enough depth of experience for a group of 18, all processing together! And it created chaos. In a way it fell apart, & therefore was awful. We couldn’t really figure out what hit us ….And often there wasn’t the time, as right after sessions, we would fall exhausted into bed every night, only to have outrageous dreams, visions & experiences with the Paqo’s in our sleep!!! It was all purification, healing & learning full steam ahead.
One participant said to me at the end, that it was the most amazing, & the most awful trip he had ever been involved in. And that put it in a nut shell.
I couldn’t wait to return home, to safety & the people I love – to be in an environment with my known healing work & spiritual connections; to the familiar…. and it’s taken me ever since to find my feet.
A Native American Shaman (friend here in SA) helped me put some of the pieces of the puzzle together, to figure out at least one mirror. It was so many life times old, he wasn’t surprised I hadn’t recognized it. I really thought I knew my ‘stuff’ after decades of transformation in this life time. But now I understand it was beyond that.
I think one of the hardest things, was not knowing WHAT I was processing – & it’s been solid processing since I returned in June! I wanted to take responsibility for my stuff, so I could change & grow. But that is hard to do, when you can’t identify or understand it. Sitting in a washing machine can eventually get a bit much. But this is something that I have learnt is typical of Andean Tradition healing structures – you vomit up ‘stuff’, you have no idea why or what – you just hold on for the ride while you clean out – & learn the hard way to relinquish control! But now I see the synchronicity, I am in awe.
This trip was so cleverly, universally orchestrated, & therefore rich beyond my wildest imaginations.
‘Not understanding’ what one is going through is hard, because in the ‘West’ we experience, explore & understand through our heads, whereas the Paqos experience through their hearts & their bodies. Learning as a Westerner to make way for this can be hard, simply because it is a new sense. As someone who thought I could experience through my heart, I discovered it is a whole other deeper way of being. Westernization & headiness in so deeply ingrained, not only in me, but my genes even. And so not only have I been processing, but I’m also having to learn a new way to experience & let go. No western material in any format, has ever prepared me for this. I definitely feel like a pioneer, looking for an internal torch.
So only now I understand his introduction:
At the beginning of our trip, on the bus driving up to 14000ft (4000m) through snow capped mountains to begin the pilgrimage, the AltoMisayoq told us that we would need to break through & experience this way of being, in order to BE the light, but also to be teachers for our own people, our own continent.
So here I am… I have found the torch, I manage to switch the torch on for a few minutes, glimpse the light before it goes out again. So I feel like I am making progress – & having to trust that this integration has it’s own timing. It’s all baby steps right now.
As I write this, I realize there are so many layers to share with you… but right now, I am going day by day. I can see in my work, my private sessions not only go deeper now, but that I ‘see’ the soul journeys of clients, from both a higher perspective & with more compassion. There is alot of creative energy starting to flow. And I know I just need to allow it to unfold. My head gets a bit freaked out, as it wants to control & plan. But it’s simply not possible to know each step right now.
I am missing Peru. I wish for the mountains in front of my eyes, the skipping Paqo’s, Climaco’s beautiful heart-enveloping hugs, being called Hermana (dear Sister) & the taste of nature in my mouth. So I will return one day!
And once this is all figured out, I will take it from there. Offer some events for you to experience, & discuss this tradition – to ripple out my learning’s & experiences with you. Maybe even a guided group tour to Peru – so watch this space.
Dare to live from the level of your heart & Soul. It does take courage, but the depth & connection it brings is worth it!
…and remember, nature is always there to sooth & regenerate us.
It’s just waiting for you to connect with it!